House/MASH crossover!
Mar. 22nd, 2007 10:17 pm![[identity profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/openid.png){kind=small}
captain-lubey.livejournal.com posting in ![[community profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/community.png){kind=small}
mash_slashTitle: Too Far
Rating: 13
Warnings: Mentions of suicide and a few swear words.
Disclaimer: I do not own MASH nor do I own House!
Author’s Notes: My first crossover fic attempt! I hope it satisfies all you dual House/MASH fans out there ;-)
Summary: House begrudgingly attends a lecture conducted by Dr Charles Emerson Winchester and tries to stir things up. However, the results are not what he expected.
Rating: 13
Warnings: Mentions of suicide and a few swear words.
Disclaimer: I do not own MASH nor do I own House!
Author’s Notes: My first crossover fic attempt! I hope it satisfies all you dual House/MASH fans out there ;-)
Summary: House begrudgingly attends a lecture conducted by Dr Charles Emerson Winchester and tries to stir things up. However, the results are not what he expected.
Dr Charles Emerson Winchester III will be holding hourly lectures regarding Thoracic and Neurological surgery from October 10th to October 20th.
Attendance is mandatory.
House took a drag from his cigarette, crumpled up the flyer and threw it across the courtyard. He wasn’t going to listen to a rich old windbag talk about the intricacies of Thoracic surgery. It would only be glorified by the fact that Winchester had survived the ‘horrors of war.’
House could almost hear Winchester’s rusty old voice now.
‘The unit could not have survived without me! I was a credit to them and I had every General in the Army begging for my skills.’
Yea…House could live without hearing that egotistical bullshit.
Taking a final drag from his cigarette, House stood up and made his way across the courtyard of Johns Hopkins. Maybe he’d pay a visit to the University bar before class was dismissed. That would eliminate any risk of getting caught by one of his professors.
House sat at the bar for half an hour before it began to fill up. Classes were over for the day and the students needed some liquid relaxation before heading to their dorms and studying.
‘Hey, Gregory!’
House winced at the use of his full name and turned in the direction of the voice. One of his fellow classmates, Rodney, was approaching the table House was seated at.
‘What do you want, Rodney?’ House groaned. He wasn’t in the mood to talk to anyone.
‘Hey, come on, Greg!’ Rodney sat opposite House. ‘You missed a great lecture today! That Winchester, he really knows what he’s talking about.’
‘Well, he’s about 70, he should know what the hell he’s talking about by now.’
Rodney rolled his eyes. ‘No, I mean you can feel the passion when he talks. He’s really been there…experienced all this pain and suffering and helped so many people.’
‘When did you get so poetic?’ House scoffed.
‘I’m serious, Greg, you should have been there…even you would have been impressed.’
The look on House’s face suggested that he was disgusted that Rodney would ever think such a thing about him much less say it.
‘Rodney, do you get some sort of perverse pleasure out of annoying me?’
‘I’ll stop annoying you if you come to the lecture with me tomorrow.’
House raised a speculative eyebrow at that comment.
‘Are you high? You honestly think that you can drag my ass into a lecture I have no interest in attending in the first place?’
Rodney leaned forward so that only House could hear him.
‘I will give you half of my stash if you attend that lecture tomorrow.’
‘Are you kidding? Only an idiot would give up that much weed.’
‘I know what it takes to get you to cooperate.’
House thought about this for a moment. As much as he hated the idea of sitting through a lecture, the temptation of getting high was very strong indeed. Besides, going to the lecture didn’t mean he actually had to listen…or behave.
‘Can I have the pot now?’
Rodney shook his head. ‘How stupid do you think I am? You get it now and you’ll have no reason to go to the lecture.’
‘True…okay…I’ll see what makes this Winchester so great. But if I don’t see pot afterwards, your car is going to get a makeover.’
‘I don’t doubt that, Greg.’
* * *
House filed into the lecture room along with the 100 other medical students. It seemed that Rodney had not exaggerated the effect Winchester had had. Every member of the class was talking enthusiastically about their new professor.
House flopped down in the seat closest to the exit and put his feet up on the chair in front of him. The girl (Marie he thought her name was) turned around and shot House a hard look.
House shrugged. ‘Hey, a man’s got to be comfortable!’
Marie frowned and went to sit in the next isle. House could have sworn he heard her mumble ‘jerk off’.
At that moment Winchester entered the room and it went completely silent.
So he commands respect, not bad for an old codger.
There was nothing spectacular about Winchester’s appearance. He was tall, overweight and balding and appeared to have the early onset of arthritis in his hands.
Nevertheless, he gave off an air of dignity that House had to (reluctantly) admit was quite impressive.
Winchester surveyed the class for a few moments before beginning his lecture. House noticed that he had a very old fashioned ‘Blue-blood Bostonian’ accent that only increased his belief that the man was indeed completely egotistical.
House had absolutely no intention of taking notes which is why 20 minutes into the lecture he was tapping his long fingers on the arm of Rodney’s chair.
Rodney leaned over to whisper to his friend, ‘Isn’t this guy amazing?’
House rolled his eyes. ‘Oh yea…he’s fucking awesome.’ Every syllable dripped with sarcasm.
Rodney shook his head and went back to taking notes.
It wasn’t that House didn’t care about his education. He did, more than he let on. But to be made to sit in a room for hours on end just listening to old windbags gripe on about shit was not something the future physician enjoyed.
‘What were the surgical conditions like in Korea, Doctor Winchester?’
House looked up suddenly at this question. Perhaps now the lecture would get interesting.
Winchester looked over at the enquiring girl and stared hard at her. So much so that she ducked her head and stared at her notes, flushing a deep scarlet. Winchester continued on with his lecture.
Ah…so Carmen hit a nerve? This might not be a waste after all.
‘Hey, baldy!’
Winchester looked indignantly up at House and narrowed his eyes.
‘How dare you?’ He snarled.
House feigned innocence. ‘How dare I? I’m not the one that completely ignored Carmen’s question!’
Most of the class were looking at House in annoyance. It was becoming very par for the course for Greg to interrupt a teacher when he got bored.
Winchester’s frown deepened. ‘What is your name?’
House grinned. ‘Gregory House at your service, Charlie.’
This introduction did nothing for Winchester’s mood which had shifted from annoyed to positively livid.
‘If you cannot conduct yourself in a respectful manner then I would appreciate it if you would leave my class Mr House!’
House shook his head. ‘Not until you answer her question.’
Winchester appeared as though he wanted to yell until the room caved in but the former surgeon took a deep calming breath and looked House directly in the eye.
‘For those of you that are curious about Korea know this. I cannot and will not discuss my time there. I will explain to you the break throughs in medical history that were discovered there. I will explain to you the conditions there. I will even tell you the colour of General McArthur’s underwear but I will not discuss my time. Is that understood?’
There was mutual nodding around the class and Winchester seemed satisfied.
‘What have you got to hide, Charlie? It can’t have been that awful. I mean, you worked for the General’s right? You were in their pockets?’
It would seem that House had gone too far this time. However, instead of screaming Winchester became oddly subdued.
‘Gregory, you are young, you are naïve. And you are also very foolish.’
House raised a bemused eyebrow at this.
‘Has it occurred to you that maybe I do not need to be reminded of the war because it was the cause of my divorce? Has it occurred to you that maybe I do not want to remember that one of my best friends hung himself two months after returning home? That the sweetest young boy I have ever met is now dying of liver failure due to excessive drinking? Did any of those things ever cross your mind, Gregory?’
For once in his life, House was completely lost for words. Here before him stood a man that had suffered so much and yet still practiced the career that sent him to hell and back.
Charles’s eyes glistened with tears but he did not allow them to fall.
‘Class dismissed.’ He mumbled.
Every student shot House a cold look as they left the hall and for once he was ashamed. Deeply, irrevocably ashamed.
House knew what it was like to want things hidden in the past. He knew what it was like to keep people out of your life to the point of being unfriendly.
Looking down at Charles, House wondered if he would ever be whole again.
END
X-Posted
Attendance is mandatory.
House took a drag from his cigarette, crumpled up the flyer and threw it across the courtyard. He wasn’t going to listen to a rich old windbag talk about the intricacies of Thoracic surgery. It would only be glorified by the fact that Winchester had survived the ‘horrors of war.’
House could almost hear Winchester’s rusty old voice now.
‘The unit could not have survived without me! I was a credit to them and I had every General in the Army begging for my skills.’
Yea…House could live without hearing that egotistical bullshit.
Taking a final drag from his cigarette, House stood up and made his way across the courtyard of Johns Hopkins. Maybe he’d pay a visit to the University bar before class was dismissed. That would eliminate any risk of getting caught by one of his professors.
House sat at the bar for half an hour before it began to fill up. Classes were over for the day and the students needed some liquid relaxation before heading to their dorms and studying.
‘Hey, Gregory!’
House winced at the use of his full name and turned in the direction of the voice. One of his fellow classmates, Rodney, was approaching the table House was seated at.
‘What do you want, Rodney?’ House groaned. He wasn’t in the mood to talk to anyone.
‘Hey, come on, Greg!’ Rodney sat opposite House. ‘You missed a great lecture today! That Winchester, he really knows what he’s talking about.’
‘Well, he’s about 70, he should know what the hell he’s talking about by now.’
Rodney rolled his eyes. ‘No, I mean you can feel the passion when he talks. He’s really been there…experienced all this pain and suffering and helped so many people.’
‘When did you get so poetic?’ House scoffed.
‘I’m serious, Greg, you should have been there…even you would have been impressed.’
The look on House’s face suggested that he was disgusted that Rodney would ever think such a thing about him much less say it.
‘Rodney, do you get some sort of perverse pleasure out of annoying me?’
‘I’ll stop annoying you if you come to the lecture with me tomorrow.’
House raised a speculative eyebrow at that comment.
‘Are you high? You honestly think that you can drag my ass into a lecture I have no interest in attending in the first place?’
Rodney leaned forward so that only House could hear him.
‘I will give you half of my stash if you attend that lecture tomorrow.’
‘Are you kidding? Only an idiot would give up that much weed.’
‘I know what it takes to get you to cooperate.’
House thought about this for a moment. As much as he hated the idea of sitting through a lecture, the temptation of getting high was very strong indeed. Besides, going to the lecture didn’t mean he actually had to listen…or behave.
‘Can I have the pot now?’
Rodney shook his head. ‘How stupid do you think I am? You get it now and you’ll have no reason to go to the lecture.’
‘True…okay…I’ll see what makes this Winchester so great. But if I don’t see pot afterwards, your car is going to get a makeover.’
‘I don’t doubt that, Greg.’
* * *
House filed into the lecture room along with the 100 other medical students. It seemed that Rodney had not exaggerated the effect Winchester had had. Every member of the class was talking enthusiastically about their new professor.
House flopped down in the seat closest to the exit and put his feet up on the chair in front of him. The girl (Marie he thought her name was) turned around and shot House a hard look.
House shrugged. ‘Hey, a man’s got to be comfortable!’
Marie frowned and went to sit in the next isle. House could have sworn he heard her mumble ‘jerk off’.
At that moment Winchester entered the room and it went completely silent.
So he commands respect, not bad for an old codger.
There was nothing spectacular about Winchester’s appearance. He was tall, overweight and balding and appeared to have the early onset of arthritis in his hands.
Nevertheless, he gave off an air of dignity that House had to (reluctantly) admit was quite impressive.
Winchester surveyed the class for a few moments before beginning his lecture. House noticed that he had a very old fashioned ‘Blue-blood Bostonian’ accent that only increased his belief that the man was indeed completely egotistical.
House had absolutely no intention of taking notes which is why 20 minutes into the lecture he was tapping his long fingers on the arm of Rodney’s chair.
Rodney leaned over to whisper to his friend, ‘Isn’t this guy amazing?’
House rolled his eyes. ‘Oh yea…he’s fucking awesome.’ Every syllable dripped with sarcasm.
Rodney shook his head and went back to taking notes.
It wasn’t that House didn’t care about his education. He did, more than he let on. But to be made to sit in a room for hours on end just listening to old windbags gripe on about shit was not something the future physician enjoyed.
‘What were the surgical conditions like in Korea, Doctor Winchester?’
House looked up suddenly at this question. Perhaps now the lecture would get interesting.
Winchester looked over at the enquiring girl and stared hard at her. So much so that she ducked her head and stared at her notes, flushing a deep scarlet. Winchester continued on with his lecture.
Ah…so Carmen hit a nerve? This might not be a waste after all.
‘Hey, baldy!’
Winchester looked indignantly up at House and narrowed his eyes.
‘How dare you?’ He snarled.
House feigned innocence. ‘How dare I? I’m not the one that completely ignored Carmen’s question!’
Most of the class were looking at House in annoyance. It was becoming very par for the course for Greg to interrupt a teacher when he got bored.
Winchester’s frown deepened. ‘What is your name?’
House grinned. ‘Gregory House at your service, Charlie.’
This introduction did nothing for Winchester’s mood which had shifted from annoyed to positively livid.
‘If you cannot conduct yourself in a respectful manner then I would appreciate it if you would leave my class Mr House!’
House shook his head. ‘Not until you answer her question.’
Winchester appeared as though he wanted to yell until the room caved in but the former surgeon took a deep calming breath and looked House directly in the eye.
‘For those of you that are curious about Korea know this. I cannot and will not discuss my time there. I will explain to you the break throughs in medical history that were discovered there. I will explain to you the conditions there. I will even tell you the colour of General McArthur’s underwear but I will not discuss my time. Is that understood?’
There was mutual nodding around the class and Winchester seemed satisfied.
‘What have you got to hide, Charlie? It can’t have been that awful. I mean, you worked for the General’s right? You were in their pockets?’
It would seem that House had gone too far this time. However, instead of screaming Winchester became oddly subdued.
‘Gregory, you are young, you are naïve. And you are also very foolish.’
House raised a bemused eyebrow at this.
‘Has it occurred to you that maybe I do not need to be reminded of the war because it was the cause of my divorce? Has it occurred to you that maybe I do not want to remember that one of my best friends hung himself two months after returning home? That the sweetest young boy I have ever met is now dying of liver failure due to excessive drinking? Did any of those things ever cross your mind, Gregory?’
For once in his life, House was completely lost for words. Here before him stood a man that had suffered so much and yet still practiced the career that sent him to hell and back.
Charles’s eyes glistened with tears but he did not allow them to fall.
‘Class dismissed.’ He mumbled.
Every student shot House a cold look as they left the hall and for once he was ashamed. Deeply, irrevocably ashamed.
House knew what it was like to want things hidden in the past. He knew what it was like to keep people out of your life to the point of being unfriendly.
Looking down at Charles, House wondered if he would ever be whole again.
END
X-Posted
![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
no subject
Date: 2007-03-22 11:40 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2007-03-22 11:42 am (UTC)Thank you so much. I was a bit concerned that they would both be OOC.
And yes, it was Hawkeye (he just seems the type to me).
no subject
Date: 2007-03-22 02:56 pm (UTC)I absolutely love your Charles. You write him better than just about anyone out there -- I actually *believe* him when he's in your fics (if that makes sense). And your House was perfect too! It's good to see he was as much of a jackass (which is what I LOVE about him) when he was young as he is as a grown man ;)
I loved this. House and M*A*S*H are two shows that I can actually *see* the crossovers ... and buy into them. Especially when they're done like this. Charles as a respected lecturer was perfect. House as a begrudging student was perfect.
>>Yea…House could live without hearing that egotistical bullshit.<<
Heh! Yeah, right. House should talk ;)
>>For once in his life, House was completely lost for words.<<
I never thought I'd see this day come ;)
Great job, sweetie. I'm very impressed with this fic. You did wonderfully. Oh and poor Hawkeye! But I can totally buy into the fact that he would commit suicide after going home. Though, and it may just be me, but I can't for the life of me figure out who the young boy is ... BJ? Radar? One of the patients? GAH!
Anyway, bravo on a fantastic story!!!
no subject
Date: 2007-03-23 02:34 am (UTC)And yes...the young boy was Radar.
no subject
First: SQUEE! House/MASH crossoverness! I started writing one once for a House group and never finished it... it's a concept that seems so perfect, though. I'm really glad you wrote this. *hugs Charles*
Second: You killed Hawkeye! *sniffles, sobs, bursts into tears as though she's never been guilty of same*
Third: You made Radar a dying alcoholic? *cries* Aww, poor Radar!
*loves on this fic*
=^_^=
Anne
no subject
Date: 2007-03-24 09:57 am (UTC)Second: *Grins sheepishly as though she's never done it before*
Third: *Nods* I'm a cruel byotch.
Again, thanks for the wonderful review!
no subject
Date: 2007-04-02 09:39 pm (UTC)*gets mauled by crossover plot bunnies*