[mijmeraar] You Never See the Lonely Me, Pt 1 of 1, 15+

[mijmeraar.livejournal.com]

Title: You Never See the Lonely Me.
Author: mijmeraar
Pairing: BJ/Hawkeye
Rating: 15 +

“There’s something I should tell you.” Hawkeye’s words are slurred, stuck together, thick with bourbon, with sticky Korean heat. His fingers fumble at the hem of BJ’s shirt, moving it up and down as if he can’t decide, yes, no, yes, don’t know.

“You’re a vegetarian?” BJ rasps, and his back is heavy on the cot, and it’s barely fit for one man let alone two. Let alone two men striving to be one.

“Not since yesterday,” Hawkeye tells BJ’s neck, can’t meet his eyes, can’t show the scattered pieces [l words, real words, oaths] “The truth is, I’m an impostor.”

“Intelligence?”

“Enough to tie my shoelaces.”

BJ bucks his hips and pulls urgently at Hawkeye’s pants, making fists, biting his lips, needing it so bad, now. “Enough to find your way around,” he says, and his thrusts move way past suggestive.

Hawkeye repositions and it feels like they’re touching everywhere, except the places they won’t touch on. “I’m not the man I pretend to be,” he says, then a kiss, a kiss, one more.

“Hawkeye?”

“Right. Him. That guy.”

BJ’s hands are under cloth and against hot skin and up, up, til they’re scraping back down with dull nails. “Care to elaborate on that?”

Hawkeye has honey hair threaded in his hands, and he says, “Just thought you should know there are things you’ll never know,” with a shrug of one shoulder, tilt of his head. BJ doesn’t pause for breath, doesn’t do much else but hold on tighter, “I know you better than I know myself.”

Hawkeye’s face is buried in BJ’s neck, his heart further down, and there’s friction and static and there’s hands working buttons, and there’s, “I don’t know me without you,” because it’s the truth, and it’s the only one they have.

Comments

[siggen1.livejournal.com]

Oh, this was just lovely! This is really BJ/Hawkeye I can believe in. Simply lovely.

Also, in this post (http://siggen1.livejournal.com/79097.html), I offer to make/send/write you something as a birthday gift - stop by and let me know what you'd like:)

[mijmeraar.livejournal.com]

Thanks so much for commenting :)

[nutmeg4077.livejournal.com]

This is perfect. I don't think a lot of writers really have a grasp on what BJ/Hawkeye is actually about, but even though this is a short fic, you've portrayed they and their relationship magnificently. Great job!

[mijmeraar.livejournal.com]

Thank you very much :D I really do love these boys, so it's nice to hear that I can write them well.

[tvjunkie1013.livejournal.com]

I'm a little short on words tonight so I'll just say ... BEAUTIFUL! :)

[mijmeraar.livejournal.com]

THANK YOU :D They are very beautiful.

[captain-lubey.livejournal.com]

Vaguely amusing and brilliant repetoire between the two!

Much love for this.

[mijmeraar.livejournal.com]

Thanks sweets! I finally found something to write. I'm glad you commented on the banter, because it usually won out over the 'serious' talks in the show.