Fic number two: Betrayed
Sep. 16th, 2007 04:43 pm![[identity profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/openid.png){kind=small}
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mash_slashTitle: Betrayed
Author: Qzeebrella
Fandom: M*A*S*H
Rating: G
Pairing: Hawkeye Pierce/Trapper John McEntire, Hawkeye/Sidney implied
Series: Guilt, Betrayed, Robbery, Slander, Perverse, Wicked, Willful
Summary: Sidney feels betrayed when he finds out Hawkeye is with Trapper.
Disclaimer: The show and its characters belong to Larry Gelbart, 20th Television Fox, CBS and Richard Hooker. No profit is being made from this story and no infringement is intended.
***
Well, I found out that Hawkeye isn’t quite the devout ladies man that he pretends to be. Unfortunately I found that out by almost stumbling over him and Trapper John just awhile ago. Which has presented me with quite the conundrum.
You see, I’ve always tried to live by G_d’s edict of thou shall not covet your neighbour’s wife. However, it’s not Trapper’s wife I’m coveting. Nor is he technically my neighbour. He’s just a friend who happens to be having sex with the man I’m pretty sure I’m in love with. I feel as if I’ve been betrayed by both of them and yet I know I have no reason to feel that way.
Yet when I think on it, it’s not the fact they’re having sex that makes me feel betrayed, it’s the other things. Like the fact Trapper gets to see Hawkeye every day. Or the fact that if there is anyone Hawk confides in, shows his true self to, it would be Trapper who gets to see it. The two of them are incredibly close and it’s that closeness that I envy. It’s that closeness that I wish I had with Hawkeye and now that I know someone else is likely enjoying it, I feel cheated.
Yet I know that I would never have been able to develop that kind of closeness with Hawkeye since we’re posted to different units and it’s just not possible for me to be near him on a day to day basis. So, it’s not reasonable for me to feel betrayed by the fact Hawkeye and Trapper are so close, yet I do.
I know it’s wrong for me to envy what they have and to wish I could take Hawkeye away from Trapper, but I do wish it. I know I’m breaking the spirit behind the command thou shall not covet and yet I can’t bring myself to care. Even if it means getting on G_d’s bad side. That is, if he exists. I sometimes doubt it, especially since coming over here. Then again I doubt everything, including myself.
So, I guess I’ll go on coveting Hawkeye and to feeling betrayed now that he’s chosen Trapper, for I just can’t stop myself. Besides, it gives me something to do.
Author: Qzeebrella
Fandom: M*A*S*H
Rating: G
Pairing: Hawkeye Pierce/Trapper John McEntire, Hawkeye/Sidney implied
Series: Guilt, Betrayed, Robbery, Slander, Perverse, Wicked, Willful
Summary: Sidney feels betrayed when he finds out Hawkeye is with Trapper.
Disclaimer: The show and its characters belong to Larry Gelbart, 20th Television Fox, CBS and Richard Hooker. No profit is being made from this story and no infringement is intended.
***
Well, I found out that Hawkeye isn’t quite the devout ladies man that he pretends to be. Unfortunately I found that out by almost stumbling over him and Trapper John just awhile ago. Which has presented me with quite the conundrum.
You see, I’ve always tried to live by G_d’s edict of thou shall not covet your neighbour’s wife. However, it’s not Trapper’s wife I’m coveting. Nor is he technically my neighbour. He’s just a friend who happens to be having sex with the man I’m pretty sure I’m in love with. I feel as if I’ve been betrayed by both of them and yet I know I have no reason to feel that way.
Yet when I think on it, it’s not the fact they’re having sex that makes me feel betrayed, it’s the other things. Like the fact Trapper gets to see Hawkeye every day. Or the fact that if there is anyone Hawk confides in, shows his true self to, it would be Trapper who gets to see it. The two of them are incredibly close and it’s that closeness that I envy. It’s that closeness that I wish I had with Hawkeye and now that I know someone else is likely enjoying it, I feel cheated.
Yet I know that I would never have been able to develop that kind of closeness with Hawkeye since we’re posted to different units and it’s just not possible for me to be near him on a day to day basis. So, it’s not reasonable for me to feel betrayed by the fact Hawkeye and Trapper are so close, yet I do.
I know it’s wrong for me to envy what they have and to wish I could take Hawkeye away from Trapper, but I do wish it. I know I’m breaking the spirit behind the command thou shall not covet and yet I can’t bring myself to care. Even if it means getting on G_d’s bad side. That is, if he exists. I sometimes doubt it, especially since coming over here. Then again I doubt everything, including myself.
So, I guess I’ll go on coveting Hawkeye and to feeling betrayed now that he’s chosen Trapper, for I just can’t stop myself. Besides, it gives me something to do.
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